Awful day..

sometimes feel hot sometimes feel cold..

sometimes wanna puke..

sometimes gonna faint..

all juz becoz M C !!!

It's just like I was locked up in a house by myself, totally separated from the outside
world to which I could not return.

My Mama said to me once: “ baby, do not think there are many people who are really fond of you. There are only very few.”Mama really did not have to say this, we know this very well ourselves; we can count on our fingers those who have a sincere regard for us, and we do
not even need 2 hands for that.

Someone said:"most effect sympathy in order to pose or as a calculated ploy."

Yes, its true,so just let me pass over this weird period, when my best intentions were
misunderstood – explained to my disadvantage –when I experienced nothing but hatred when I offered only smile and peace - when I didn't know where I should go to.
I wanna breathe in the air of the furthest place from here to rid myself completely of the
residue of those awful things which still clings on to me—there is not much that still
holds me back.
Day and night I ponder on the means by which it might yet be possible to escape the strict
reality… Its really firm and strong and I could not shake them from me, break them, if it
were not for that other bond, which binds me to my world: the love I have for those who
gave me life, to whom I owe everything, everything. May I, do I have the right, to break
the heart of those who throughout my life have shown me nothing but love and goodness and
who have surrounded me with such tender care? I would break their hearts if I indulged my
desires and did what my whole being yearns for with every heartbeat, with every breath I
take.
Giving up the love one has enjoyed may be simply too great a price to pay. Exit may be
possible only when the price is right.
I feel tired..